A large part of success is not striving to be liked by all. If you aim to always please others, then you will never be able to do what is best for you and achieve your own personal goals.
However, academics, specifically elementary to high school, puts kids in a place where their only option is to be liked by the majority of others or they will not have many or any friends. Here are the 5 ways school will make you fail:
1. You Only Have One Group To Make Friends
The kids at your school are the core group of the people you associate with. If none of them like you, you will have a very lonely time as a student, thus a need and want for friends arises. The only result of clawing for friends is depression, which is a HUGE distracter. Depression sucks away your motivation and leads you in the opposite direction of being fully productive.
2. You Have No Time For Yourself
If you are too busy trying to get others to like you, you will be stuck doing what others want you to do, you will be unable to focus on growing yourself, your goals, and the massive action you need to take. While you are running around attempting to gain friends, you leave yourself no time for you. The less time you give yourself, thus less time spent growing, will not allow you focus on using your abilities to help others. This is the opposite of providing value and you must provide value to be successful.
3. You Become What Others Want
Following up on doing what actions others want you to take, you will also become what others want you to be, and more likely than not, what they want will not help you become successful. Let’s be honest here, the majority of people you know do not have massive success, especially if they are a fellow student. They may be successful on their own terms, but not on yours. One person’s success is another person’s average.
4. You Fall Into A Toxic Mental Trap
You will develop a mental trap that, if not put to rest early, will carry into your adult life and affect all of your outcomes. Think of how many adults in your life care way too much about what other people think.
Think of how many adults in your life don’t do what makes them happy because they are too afraid to let others down. I know way too many. I also know way too many people who literally tell me to do what others want just and make them happy because it’s the “right thing to do”. This is incredibly toxic way to live and will make others happy and successful, but not you.
5. You Gain Poor Emotional Intelligence
You will not be happy through being what others want you to be. Happiness is a key part of being successful. It is extremely hard to better yourself and provide value to others if you are depressed. Focusing on your goals and ambitions is mentally exhausting when you are lonely and sad. When you are not happy, it is hard to care about the goals you want to achieve, even the most important ones.
Instead, we need to promote strategies for students to have high self-esteem. Successful people shake things up and act as a charging bull against the status quo. As a successful person, you will be hated on and criticized. One cannot handle that if they are always trying to please others and have low self-esteem.
They will back-peddle and quit on their goals because they are too busy making everyone else happy. Learning to embrace your weirdness is tons of fun and will yield you divine results. Always remember that you have to be a freak to be freaky successful.
Photo Cred: MufidSukkar.com